341 days and counting.

Just a second ago I was sitting and then all of a sudden, words started forming on my tongue and pressing against my skin and revolving round and round in my head. I knew it was time to write.


I've been away for just too long now... And it's starting to eat away at me. From my favorite place in the world, I mean. But I guess you don't know what I'm talking about.


Peru, actually. Or, I'd say, anywhere in South America. It's my most favorite continent of all, hands down. Although I've only been once, the second I stepped out of the airport into that thick sweet air, I knew I was claimed by a place I hadn't even explored yet.


I feel like I need to go back there. Honestly. Even though some of you know my impulsive tendencies to travel transcontinentally on short notice, I know what you're thinking, "Mary Palmer, you just can't get up and leave right now." You're right. And this time I'm going to listen to you. But know that it's not without a heavy heart that I write my consent. All of you must think I'm pretty strange to feel this deeply about a place. I've always been like this though... places stick to me. Or rather, I stick to them. But nothings stuck as well as Peru before.


Like I said, I need to go back. I'm getting a little tired here.. just stuck where I am. I need to do a little exploring. I need to be somewhere unfamiliar, where I can't understand anyone (I speak French. I'm just useless.) and where their customs, colors, clothes, values.. are different. I want to be selfless for a while, like them Peruvians. Peru is a country that has NOT ONCE won a battle. Haha, isn't that different to hear? Coming from a country where power is everything. Being on top is EVERYTHING. People will kill for it. People have died from it. But Peru... haha oh goodness, they've tried, but it hasn't exactly worked out in their favor. And that has played into their lives and hearts. Instead of Americans, thinking they're entitled to anything and everything they want, Peruvians are selfless. They are humble. They are sincere. They are the most honest and hardworking people I've ever met. And I've met a lot of people.


I'd rather be seeing.... mustard colored walls.

Dirt roads.

Coarse black hair.

Purple drinks made from corn. (I realize this is a weird one, but it's just so tasty!)

Hand-made houses with a backdrop of the Andes.

Alpacas.

Sun kissed dark skin.

I want to hear some real music right in front of me, dadgumit!

Is that too much to ask for? Probably so. But my heart's a-wandering... 

Porque Jehova no mira lo que mira el hombre,
pues el hombre mira lo que esta delante
de sus ojos, pero Jehova mira el corazon.
1 Samuel 16:7

My hearts been aching for Peru. Countdown. 341 days till I'm home.

the grey in this city.

Has anyone realized how grey it is lately? Grey, grey, grey. All the time.


I've noticed more and more lately God's faithfulness. If you haven't thought about it in awhile.... try it. It's pretty cool. I pray daily for God to lend His strength for me to not give in to these habitual sins. And guess what. He does. I'm so very excited to continue going (and growing) along this path with Him.


I have these really cool little friends of mine. It is my hearts job and passion to listen to and encourage them. Sometimes they have this mindset (which I fear is more common than I think) that our relationship with God is supposed to be 100% fantastic and amazing and incredible and easy every step of the way. And I thought about it. And it is, really it is. But at the same time, we're human. God's never changed His attitude towards us. We change. And I change rather frequently. But the God we experience on the 'mountaintops' is still there. Such temporal vision... 


From time to time when my vision is muddled enough with distractions for me to realize it's muddled.. I can catch glimpses of things to come. Some glorious things. And I bet it won't be grey.


‘He will swallow up death forever; and the Lord God will wipe away tears from all faces, and the reproach of his people he will take away from all the earth, for the Lord has spoken.’

(My father got him and me front row tickets to see Punch Brothers on February 20th as my birthday present. I have a great dad.)

i have to do this

I have to do this because... I just do.


Additional blog of mine for you guys:
http://somewordswithfriends.blogspot.com/

This is from me and my best friend David. We're separated by many miles, and this is how we keep up with each other. We'll share our wisdom, funny stories, and love with all of you. Get ready to live our friendship through letters.


David told me that he only reads my blog if there are pictures on it. So, everyone likes a cute puppy.

i cannot give an answer.

listen.

i will not boast in anything.

and it came like a call from the Lord.

Wowzers. It's been quite some time since I've written. I hope you accept my apology. I can tell you why though:


Everything has sped up. It feels like my life was going slowly, at a stroll (which was annoying, somewhat). And now, it feels like I've just hit a dead sprint. And I'm running, running, running. 


Currently, I'm sitting at Sneaky Beans. I'm supposed to be studying for my economics test tomorrow, but as you can see... well... that just didn't work out so well.


I started back to school with all these plans to make it go by quickly: 1. positive attitude 2. talk to people 3. get a job. So far, all 3 of those have failed. Haha, shows how well my planning is. And once I stopped and looked around, trying to regroup and see where my plans took me, I realized I got nowhere. I accomplished nothing I wanted to. However, God has pulled me somewhere else entirely. His plans are always so much better than mine.


I left my slow stroll for a sprint when (pause. I just realized there's a camera in this room. This shouldn't surprise me but it actually freaks me out a little bit. continuing on) I started meeting all my new fellow classmates from Belmont. And they're a group of winners, for sure. I've talked to a handful of them and they're full of lovely and talented folks. I realized recently how much of an experience college is going to be with all these people. One new noteworthy pal is Anneke. Nice name, right? I think so, too. Her and I are rather similar, and it's refreshing coming from a high school where no one is like me. I've known her for less than a week, but I can just tell - we're two peas in a pod.
Another one for note is Kadileigh. Another great name, don't'cha think? She reads the same books as me! She's seen our favorite author (Donald Miller: the man, the myth, the legend) speak more than once! That just blows my mind. She's super. Her and I are just destined to be friends.


So, God has opened a door this new year. I've got a little less than a semester left. I can do this.... right? I sure hope so. It doesn't seem like it a lot of the time. 
And here we are again…

Uncertainty piled on uncertainty; only to find that there is certainty and solidity underneath. God leads, this I know; and prayers have been heard and answered and I am oh so thankful for the confirmations. 

I've seen a lot of blog posts lately about new years resolutions. Here's my two cents worth. I do have a few new years resolutions... but the basis of all of them is to love. 

Food for thought:

Love is, as far as I can tell, the most mature response to any situation - the pinnacle of what it means to be truly human. Love is a wrench in the wheels of cause and effect, of reactionary living, of casual imitation. Yes, speed and events are all around us in the information age, but motion, true motion, is rare. Love is the movement.
- Jon Foreman

If you like good music, listen here. I honestly have listened to this song on repeat for 2 hours straight now.